Valentine’s Day was last week but my word for the year is Love, so I am constantly thinking about what that word means to me and how I can love others better.

One of the best ways to love others better, is to truly learn to love ourselves FIRST. Even Jesus acknowledged the importance of self-love as the second commandment after Loving God in Matthew 22:37-39. And when I say love ourselves, I don’t just mean going to a spa or getting a manicure or pedicure, although that can be a form of #selfcare. But loving yourself often means putting up boundaries so you aren’t overscheduled, saying “No” to things you don’t want to do, controlling negative self-talk, finding aspects of your body and personality that you love, practicing gratitude, actively engaging in prayer/meditation, and even updating your wardrobe. Practicing self-love is the process of supporting yourself mind, body, and spirit.

While I do think that updating your wardrobe should not be the only aspect of your self-love journey you should focus on, I do think it is helpful. If we are not careful, we dress in ways that do not flatter our unique body shape, the career, and the job we want, or the events we want to attend. And we can end up in a rut. Updating a wardrobe can be expensive, but it doesn’t have to be. Adding a few new colorful accessories, updating your favorite pair of heels, and buying a new or “thrifted” suit are all great examples of how we can position ourselves to be the best possible version of ourselves that we can be.

When we practice radical self-love, something magical takes place, we learn how to truly love others. We find ourselves offering others the grace we freely give ourselves. We forgive others because we have first forgiven ourselves. We can genuinely be happy for others because we are happy about the blessings in our own life. And when we dress and feel our best we are able to offer our best self wherever we go.

So this post isn’t just about buying what we want because I do not support overconsumption, but this post is about doing the work inwardly and managing our outward personal development as well. We cannot give from an empty cup. So I hope can all learn to fill our cups so we can truly give from our overflow.

What are some ways that you practice self-love?